Many of the high school experiences seem incredibly important to teens today, but in reality, they will have little significance in the future. That’s why one of the most helpful gifts a parent can give your student during the college admissions process is to provide the long-term perspective.
Losing an election, sitting on the bench instead of starting for the team, not getting the part or the position or the role your student wanted—many teens will struggle to separate the gravity of their disappointment today from the likelihood that new and even better things are to come tomorrow.
Parents, here are two keys providing long-term perspective to your teens:
1. Don’t lose that perspective yourself. If you are spinning out of control about an SAT score, a B in Geometry, or one selection of another student over yours, your student won’t have a healthy example to learn from.
2. Praise efforts over outcomes. Long-term benefits rarely come from awards, titles, and recognitions. They come from the efforts that lead to those distinctions—an effort without the accompanying reward or award might feel less valuable today, but their long-term worth is equal if not greater to what the formal recognition might have been.
Students haven’t been on the planet long enough to experience the long-term benefits of their efforts and attitudes. Expect that they’ll be inherently more focused on the short-term. Then relish the opportunity to give them something only you can give: perspective.