You can’t replicate other peoples’ college admissions results. Even if you take the same classes, get the same grades and test scores, and do the same activities as the kid who got into Yale, it doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get into Yale, too. College admissions is a personal process, especially at the more selective schools. If there were one duplicable, perfect formula for admission, someone would have found and profited from it already.
But you can replicate the process.
Look at families who have a college admissions process that is full of anxiety. Many of them have students who are predicating all of their hard work on the hopes of admission to a very small list of highly-selective colleges. They’re not interested in finding the right schools. They’re only interested in getting accepted to what they think are the best schools.
Is that the process that you want?
Then look at families who seem to be enjoying the process. Many of them have students who are working hard, too. But they’re trusting that their student’s work ethic and character will make her ultimately successful at whatever college she attends. They know they don’t need an admission from a dream school to validate all that hard work. They’re making the decision to enjoy this exciting time.
Which of those processes would you prefer?
You can’t choose the outcome, but you get to choose the route to get there. Watch how other families manage the process and ask yourself, “Which route would I prefer?” Then feel free to replicate it.