It’s possible for kids to be too focused on getting into college.
It’s good to encourage kids to care about their college futures. But if that focus leads them to make every decision in high school based on how it will look to colleges, they’re trying to game the system rather than follow their own interests. And that never works in college admissions.
A student should be able to love playing the trumpet even if he’s not good enough at it to play in a college marching band. A student should be able to take a cooking class over the summer with no regard for whether or not colleges will appreciate it. A student should be happy with her part time job at the mall even if it’s not as impressive sounding as an internship at a law firm. And there should always be time allotted for things that have absolutely nothing to do with college, like getting adequate sleep, reading a book about baseball, and enjoying general teenage goofing off.
Kids that tie every decision to how it will look to colleges end up sounding like drones. They’ve approached high school like a checklist to be completed rather than a time to learn, find their interests and even have some fun along the way.
It’s no accident that so many college applications ask students to talk about their favorite subjects or teachers, the activity that’s meant the most to them, what they do for fun, what their hobbies are, and what part of college they’re most excited about. Kids who’ve approached high school with a single-minded devotion to pleasing colleges never have answers to those questions like the kids who’ve led balanced lives do.
Fulfilled adults have learned how to balance a devotion to their work with their enjoyment of family, friends, hobbies and things that will never earn them a raise. Help your kids to find that balance in high school. They’ll be happier, more successful college applicants if you do.