The consistent references to “your child” in Challenge Success’s “Top Ten Back-to-School Tips to Help Your Child Thrive” might cause some high school parents to pass by the advice. But I don’t see a single one that doesn’t apply when you swap out “child” for “teen.”

Parents, remember that you, more than your teen’s school or friends, set the tone for how your family approaches education and the college admissions process. Many other families, particularly those in areas with a pervasive kids-must-get-into-prestigious-colleges mentality, will fly in the face of these tips. They will not resist the urge to fix problems for their kids. They will not prioritize work done with integrity over work that receives an “A.” They will not leave technology behind at dinner time, encourage regular downtime, or encourage passions independently of their (often incorrectly) reported college admissions value.

But that doesn’t mean you must do the same thing in your house. Kids stand out by being the best versions of themselves, not by following what everyone else is doing. And standing out starts at home.